Leadership

What is leadership exactly? I've been told that I have it before, I've also been told that I lack it. I want to step to a position of power but that would mean I would be alone, isolated. No one would be my peer. I would be looked at for information and guidance but I don't feel much more. Lau Tzu said that to lead someone you must walk behind them, I find that enlightening but don't know how to act on it. How can you lead someone without telling them exactly what to do or subordinating them? I could be nice and soft-spoken but the result is still the same. It must be lonely being on top I think of people even higher than I and feel empathy for them. Is it a test of myself and my abilities or something completely different, a test of my leadership isn't really test of me. It's not just another quality like seeing how funny or smart I am, it's like an alter-ego. A super-hero even. How could Is say no to that? My mind tells me no and how illogical it is but my pride tells me yes.

contemplating,

Sam