Going back?

I almost wrote I was going home. But I don't think it's a place I can call home anymore...I was estatic when I remembered I was getting to be withy friends and drink. I felt worried because for the first time I was looking for alcohol as an escape. Which are tell tale signs of alcoholism...are my group activities rubbing off on me? I hope not negatively, I sought it after for how I could become bettered not get worse. Though I know I control myself, I am the master of my domain. I want to help; but I also want to live for myself. Struggling with identities, of what roles I play: I don't want boy friend to be one of them now. I wish I knew the right and wrong ways to do eerything in life. I'm so used to looking at cheats or some kind of FAQ finding the right answers. I do t know if I hve them anymore and don't k ow if anyone has them for me. The work just keeps piling up but it's okay. I know I'm able to handle it...


Speeding,

Sam E